This is an imaginary phone call from Amber

I actually said it to myself in the car and recorded it on my phone. I went home and transcribed it. Its not a very good piece of writing, so I won't bother putting it here. 



Then I rewrote it in the way that I would express myself in writing




Jan 21 2013.



I spent the last month in my pajamas feeling sad for what I lost. But today I think I would like to rejoin and reconnect and come back to this world that I live in now.

My name is Amberle Reyes. I am 30 years old. I live in my parents’ basement. I don’t have a paying job. I applied for unemployment from the state of Colorado last week and they may give me $88 per week. I don’t know for how long. I don’t think it’s the right thing to do. But it’s the best thing to do while I look for a job. I want to be gainfully employed, but I want to have enough time to continue pursue my passion, what I believe is my life’s work. I believe in job creation and the power of cooperative business to create economic stability from the bottom up. I believe in Uganda and hardworking, friendly people in a tropical environment. I want to live in Uganda, make pretty things out of rubbish and do development projects, which create small businesses to generate income locally, in Uganda. I want to make enough money to be with my family in America for a few weeks out of the year. I want to be able to travel. 



In order to achieve this, I am in the process of starting a business with my sister, Andrea. A. Bernadette is a non-profit organization partnering with artisans in Uganda to transform natural and waste materials into beautiful jewelry and accessories. Through A. Bernadette, we will sell these products in America, generating income that will allow us to continue to design new products and create cooperative businesses in Uganda that will help the artisans we work with generate income locally so they don’t become dependent on us and our sales in America. 



My current role with A. Bernadette is as social media and marketing director. I have no formal experience in this field, but am confident that I will be able to reach out for educational opportunities and mentors in the field. I have created a preliminary Social Media Strategy and hope to continue to refine it in the weeks to come. I am comfortable with this “work in progress” and am excited to approach this new challenge by utilizing and building on my prior experience, skills, and knowledge.  









I've been working and thinking a lot about this media and how and why I want to communicate. I'm not sure just how transparent to be. I am enjoying the process of going through old journal entries, photos, and videos and picking out little bits to share. But in the end they all seem -old- so I want to create content (see that, I'm learning the lingo) that is new and interesting and strong. I have all sorts of concerns about how personal my posts should be because this is a business, but this is a personal business, isn't it?





This is an imaginary phone call from Amber. 

i took a long walk and only fell once

I'm reading this book called shantaram. its about a man who escapes from prison in australia and hides in india. its very good. its also very long. i like that, it makes me feel safe and comfortable to have a book around for a long time. i can space it out and read a few chapters at a time. sometimes, with short books, i tend to read them all at once and then they're gone.

so, in this book it says,

" ... and you can't change anything. you can't do anything about it. you have to accept that things could be worse, and they'll never be better, and you're completely helpless in the face of it.

'its good to know what's wrong with the world,' karla said, after a while. 'but its just as important to know that sometimes, no matter how wrong it is, you can't change it. a lot of bad stuff in the world wasn't really that bad until someone tried to change it.'

'i'm not sure i want to believe that. i know you're right. i know we make things worse sometimes, the more we try to make them better. but i want to believe that if we do it right, everything and everyone can change for the better."

i think that sums up my internal monologue right now. i'm trying to figure out what the "do it right" part means. that's the work part; the devil is in the details. the world is suffering and suffering is the world. the dalai lama says the first thing to do is identify the causes of suffering and then try to eliminate them.

I've got to put this down...

its 11:57 pm and i'm sweaty and tired. after emails and phone meetings and evening shopping at the market and necklace class and compound hunting and lots of other things, sleep should come easy. maybe it's too much sweet tea or monitor glare.

today my progress was twice blocked by an anti-homosexual march. i was driving down main street and noticed some mzungus on motorbikes carrying pastel-colored signs and honking horns and yelling. i was intrigued until i read the signs. the crowd driving and marching down the street got thicker until the whole road was blocked. by that time i was trying to make a right-hand turn across that side of main street. (yes, we drive on the left here) and was trapped watching as hundreds walked and drove carrying signs of the most hateful nature. i eventually made my right turn and did my commercial business and there they were again, blocking my path for a second time. i don't often feel rageful, but sometimes i think indignation is appropriate.

today i hated americans. i hate right-wing religious zealots who think its ok to promote the government-sanctioned killing of people they don't like in places where government-sanctioned killing turns into genocide. i hate people who incite an underfed, undereducated population into taking to the streets when angry mobs kill people who happen to cross their paths. i hate all people who just watched the hatred go by. i hate that this is another reason not to live in this place and trust these people. i hate that colonialist westerners continue to come here and leave their oppressive, self-loathing fear of everything behind. i hate that this country will be seen as ignorant and intolerant and will be ignored by NGOs who say they are only here to help. i hate the sanctimonious bullshit that comes out of black and white mouths. i hate that people i love don't want to come here to visit me because they will have to hide who they are.

later in the day, i realized there are more things i hate. i hate that women i know have to have more children than they know they can take care of. i hate that they have to choose between getting their teeth fixed and feeding their children. i hate that they don't know that soda causes cavities and that they don't know what cavities are. i hate that their clothes are ripped and falling apart and pregnant women wear shirts they can't button because they don't have any other clothes. i hate that they aren't hateful and are able laugh and smile and have a good time while they are experiencing these things. i hate when i see this and i feel small and stupid. i hate that i whine about paper cuts and sweatyness to people who have teeth pulled with no anesthesia and have never experienced indoor plumbing. i hate that they show me that i have the choice to be hateful.

it's 12:16 am. a new day. maybe today i won't be hateful. maybe i'll look at what i have and what i have done and feel satisfied that the equation balances. maybe i'll go use my indoor plumbing and accept the truth that it just takes more everything to keep me alive and functioning and i'm lucky because i've never had to suffer. maybe i'll go to sleep and feel better because

greetings from new jersey

still trapped in jersey because of snow at heathrow. the packing is complete. (except for the fact that i can't fit the hiking boots and the accordion) my dad just brought me strapping tape so i can properly bind my 50 pound box. the other 3 bags are self-contained. i'm a little nervous never having travelled with 4 50 pound bags, but andrea assures me that there are free wheely carts as soon as you land in entebbe. i hope so. i'm bored, so i'm going to cook something...then eat it. hobby number one...check. hobby number two...check.

Adventures in Ethiopia

Hello From Addis Ababa!

Happy belated Halloween! So first week complete. Here is a mini update of all my doings. I am living with 5 volunteers, all from the U.S., where we live in a 4 story house. The digs are nice but the water is shisty.. AKA goes out for days at a time. The first day was spent at Layla where the kids live. We set up a haunted house for them which was a great success. The orphanage is really nice and the kids don't listen but they aren't beaten soo it is a good environment for them. Ivy is the program director who has lived here for 2 and a half years and is a total jersey party girl haha. I love her and I love watching her. It is really preparing me for my roll in Uganda.
We all dressed up for halloween, I painted my face like a zebra. It was a hit! They pronounce zebra with a short e kinda like debra. I think I may change my name and therefore tattoo the zebra print on my face. I think it will complete my look.

After the weekend I spent most of my time at Layla learning about the organization, and meeting all the women and children. The other volunteers have been here for a while so I decided to work in the baby house. I have made significant positive changes already. I scrubbed all the baby rooms and put borax done to fix the roach problem(my mom would be so proud).
So most of my time is spent with the babies feeding them bottles, cooing at them, and whispering in there ears(shuushhhuushhuushhh). I love them. The women watch me play with the babies and I think are mirroring some of my behaviors. If one is not eating enough I give them more attention, if one is turning I am helping them try and crawl. So therefore I love them all and want to bring them home with me. I can now take care of 5 babies all at once!

So that brings us to this past weekend. A bunch of the volunteers and I went about 2 hours outside Addis to a place called the Portugues Bridge. There were amazing waterfalls. We all jumped off the waterfall! Sorry mom I know you said no death defying stories until I return.. It was the most amazing panoramic view. The pictures just do not do the scenery justice.

The night life in Addis is also pretty cool. Alot of rasta places to dance at and tons of different kinds of food. Next week the plan is to go to Awash for the weekend! Thats all for now! Stay Tuned

I'm ALIVE

Hey.. Just made it to the volunteer house in Addis Ababa. All the volunteers seem very nice and YOUNG! They told me I was the oldest and therefore the mom of the house : / I have already gotten one marriage proposal and have decided I am going to buy myself a ring tomorrow. We are throwing a halloween party tomorrow for the kids which should be super fun. Amber feel free to put this entry on our blog. There is internet at the house but it is sloooow. Love you all..

talk soon,
Andrea

Hola From Argentina!

Hola amigos!

Where do I begin? I am currently in Buenos Aires, Argentina. The first week has been great. I believe I have eaten a whole cow(yes they eat beef for breakfast, lunch, and dinner), I have gotten a little crispy from the sun, and 

am improving my spanish by the minute. This past week we took a plane to Northern Argentina where we stayed a nice little hostel called Hostel Sweet Hostel. We did extreme sports the first day, rock climbing, zip lining, rappelling, and a boat ride where we were in the middle of Paraguay, Brazil, and Argentina. The second day we went to El Parque National Iguazu. The Iguazu Falls are these amazing water falls. People say they are better than Niagara Falls(I have not been therefore I can't comment, NEXT TRIP!) Below is a picture of the falls. We were able to take a boat and go right into the falls. Than we walked up and around the falls to get the amazing view from the top. The scenez were breath taking. 

Tomorrow we are leaving for Uruguay! Stay tuned!

~Andrea